Daily Interesting Link - Funny or Interesting Anagrams
Posted on Saturday, September 26, 2009
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- · Motley Crue: Me Cruel Toy
· Bob Marley: Marble Boy
· William Shakespeare: I'll make a wise phrase
· Jay Leno: Enjoy L.A.
· Gene Simmons: Immense Song
· Mother-in-law = Woman Hitler
· The Morse Code = Here Come Dots
· Microsoft Windows = Sown in discomfort
· John Mayer = Enjoy harm
· Belgium = Big mule
· The eyes = They see
· Barbie doll = Liberal bod
· George Bush = He bugs Gore
· Waitress = A stew, Sir?
· Guinness draught = naughtiness drug
· Breasts = Bra sets
· The Titanic disaster = Death, it starts in ice
· Apple Products = Support Placed
· Western Union = No Wire Unsent
· Bruce Springsteen = Creep brings tunes
· Tom Cruise = So I'm Cuter
· vegetarian = ate in grave
· graduation = out in a drag
· Dick Cheney = Needy Chick
· Debit card = Bad credit
· A Decimal Point = I'm a Dot in Place
· Jennifer Aniston = fine in torn jeans
· Achievements = Nice, save them
· Clothespins = So Let's Pinch
· Christine = Nice Shirt
· Spice Girls = Pig Slices
· The Cincinnati Reds = Indecent Christian
· Dormitory = Dirty Room
· Confessional = On scale of sin
· David Letterman = Nerd Amid Late TV
· Princess Diana = end is a car spin
· President W = Newest Drip
· Statue of Liberty = Built to Stay Free
· Laxative = exit lava
· Evangelist = Evil's Agent
· George W Bush = he grew bogus
· Beavis and Butthead = Thus, be a bad deviant
· Astronomer = moon starer
· Apple, Inc = Epic Plan
· San Francisco Giants- Fascinating, No scars
· Pre Calculus = Call up curse
· Stupid Girl = Drips Guilt
· madonna louise ciccone = one cool dance musician
· The United States of America = Attaineth its cause, freedom
· Desperation = A Rope Ends It
· Dancing with the stars = Winners had tight acts
· Sherlock Holmes = He'll mesh crooks
· Frito Lay = Oily Fart
· Baseball = Babes All
· Christina Aguilera = Ugly Satanic Hair
· Conversation = Voices Rant On ASTRONOMER: MOON STARER
· THE EYES: THEY SEE
· Geologist = Go Get Oils
· Christmas = Trims cash
· Why do you care? = Hey you coward!
· President Bush = Burnished Pest
· Action man = cannot aim
· The Simpson's = men's hot piss
· Year two thousand = a year to shut down
· Debit card = Bad Credit
· shower time = where moist
· Santa Monica = satanic moan
· goodbye = Obey god
· ipod lover = poor devil
· Narcissism = Man's crisis
· Actor Sylvester Stallone = Very cool talentless star
· Funeral = Real Fun
· comfort is = microsoft
· Hot water = Worth tea
· Television programming = Permeating living rooms
· Margaret Thatcher = That great charmer
· Darling I love you = Avoiding our yell
· The Country Side = No City Dust Here
· Flamethrower = oh, felt warmer
· Clint Eastwood = Old West Action
· Ronald Wilson Reagan = Insane Anglo Warlord
· Saddam Hussain = Humans sad side
· Sheryl crow = her slow cry
· Howard Stern = Retard Shown
· Ladybug = bald guy
· Astronomers = No more stars
· Snooze Alarms = Alas! No More Z's
· A Gentleman = Elegant Man
· I hate school = oh so ethical
· No admittance = contaminated
· Microwave = Warm Voice
· Austin Powers = power us satin
· T.S. Eliot = toilets
· A telescope = To see place
· Elvis = lives
· Justin Timberlake = im a jerk but listen
· Mel Gibson = Big Melons
· The Apple Macintosh = Machines apt to help
· Eleven plus two = Twelve plus one
· Christmas = Trims cash
· The Meaning of Life = The fine game of nil
· Schoolmaster = The classroom
· A shoplifter = has to pilfer
· listen = silent
· Chemistry = shit, me cry
· Gene Simmons = Immense Song
· A Domesticated Animal = Docile, as a Man Tamed it
· Garbage Man = Bag Manager
How To Creep People Out
Best of F My Life!
Posted on Sunday, September 20, 2009
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Best of F My Life!
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection.My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't hang out with me because he felt really sick. I went to his house anyway to surprise him with homemade soup. I walk in to his room only to find him hooking up with my sister.She can't drive, our mom drove her there. FML
Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room... my electric toothbrush in her hand. FML
Today, I wanted to have a good lunch with my wife before fasting for my surgery which I may not survive, she decided getting her hair cut was more important. I ate alone. FML
Check Out More at : Http://www.fmylife.com
Things People Said - Patient Charts
Posted on Saturday, September 19, 2009
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Doctors' Comments On Patient Charts:
* "Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year."
* "On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely."
* "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993."
* "Discharge status: Alive but without permission."
* "Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful."
* "The patient refused an autopsy."
* "The patient has no past history of suicides."
* "Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital."
* "Patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days."
* "Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch."
* "She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night."
* "She is numb from her toes down."
* "While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home."
* "The skin was moist and dry."
* "Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches."
* "Patient was alert and unresponsive."
* "She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce."
* "I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy."
* "The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead."
* "Patient has two teenage children but no other abnormalities."
* "Skin: Somewhat pale but present."
* "Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen, and I agree."
* "By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart stopped, and he was feeling better."
* "The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed."
* "When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room."
* "Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing."
* "The patient will need disposition, and therefore we will get Dr. Blank to dispose of him."
* "The patient expired on the floor uneventfully."
